These days, our kids’ mental health has never been more fragile, largely due to the impact of technology and self-esteem crushing apps like “Ask Me,” or platforms like TikTok and Instagram, where they constantly compare their looks and social lives. They’re navigating a world that’s perilous for their self-esteem and it’s all too easy for them to feel like failures. So, how do we, as parents, build them up instead of tearing them down?
Self-esteem doesn’t come naturally; it’s something that develops over time. We, as parents, have a crucial role in the early years to encourage our children to believe in themselves. Building healthy self-esteem takes effort. The basic definition of self-esteem is “your attitude or belief about yourself.”
Children with healthy self-esteem respect themselves, can control their behavior, are confident, love themselves, and trust their decision-making. On the other hand, children with poor self-esteem lack confidence in their appearance, give up easily, feel like failures, and struggle with decision-making. It’s essential for us to actively support and nurture their self-worth from a young age.
What are Soul Building Words?
Soul-building words are those that encourage, empower, and make you feel understood and believed in—no matter what.
As parents, we’ve all been there, getting completely frustrated when trying to teach our kids something like riding a bike.
If your child falls off their bike and hears, “You’re still doing it wrong. I’ve shown you how to ride multiple times. Can’t you get it already?” it tears down their self-esteem. Your child might start believing they can’t do anything right, and stop trying altogether.
Instead, use positive, soul-building words like, “Good try! You’re getting better each time. I know you can get it this time.” This shows your child that you believe in their abilities, encouraging them to believe in themselves.
Try These Soul Building Words
“I will wait for you.”
“Take your time.”
“You make my day better.”
I say those words to my slow-moving, often frustrating child, and then I see their eyes light up with gratitude and their tiny shoulders relax.
“It doesn’t have to be perfect.”
“Okay, you can have a few more minutes to work on your project.”
I say those words to my driven, determined, dream-chasing child, and then I watch as the pressure lifts from her chest and her aspirations soar even higher.
“It’s good enough for today.”
“Be kind to yourself.”
“Today matters more than yesterday.”
I say those words to my own perfection-seeking, parent-focused heart that often replays past mistakes, and then I watch as my clenched hands open and tears of relief fall.
The words “I love you” should never be underestimated; every person has certain words that make their soul come alive.
